Change | living for the now
For one of the first times on my blog im going to be honest with you guys and with some of the people around me. I never really know how to say things like this so I feel if I want to be a good role model to some of my readers who have asked for advice like this then what better to put it in a blog where the whole internet can see! I just want to say I don't want people to think im being soppy or dramatic this is just the way I feel and like I said I've had requests for a blog like this and felt it was right at this moment in time.
As some of the people around me may have guessed I haven't really been myself recently I've felt lost and clueless like most people my age feel at this point in their lives. I'm not saying all people go through this but a good percentage of them do. I'm getting to the point in my life where I have to make so many decisions that shape my future and honestly I'm scared. I'm really scared. It only seems like yesterday that I was going into year 7 and time has gone by so fast and I feel like I kind of lost myself on the way. I feel like I forgot about the goals that I have had for many years now and whenever someone such as my sister asks me about it I always make excuses of why I haven't done them or worked for them which is totally wrong. I wish I didn't get into a habit of doing this but unfortunately I did. Because I left it for so long I started loosing my confidence with it which made me put it off even more. I have said for the past 3 summers now that I would start to upload on my Youtube channel but Im sure as many of you know there is only one video up of the interview I did with the M.A.D boys which I obviously loved doing and am so grateful that they let me do it but its still not what I wanted my main focus to be.
Going back to what I said earlier I have had a lot of decisions to make and its been really stressing me out and bringing me down and it shouldnt be getting to me this much. I have to make my mind up of what I want to do after I leave college and what paths I want to take. I also have to think about my final A Level grades and if im even able to get into university. I just feel its a lot of pressure at a young age to have to decide what you want to do for potentially the rest of your life . I know some people say the grades dont define you as a person and yes I agree 100% with that, however they do define if you can get into university or not. On one hand I do want to go to university and prove to people that I can do it and I feel the experience would be brilliant and obviously the fact you can get a degree out of it. But on the other hand I dont know if I would feel comfortable there and I dont know what I want to do yet. Of course I will still apply for as many university's as I can but at the moment I still need to think about what will be the best option for me and my future.
Like I said I dont know what I want to do when Im older. If it was up to me I would be doing full time blogging and Youtubing but that takes years to build up a good profile but I was to chicken to start a few years ago and sadly left it till now. I know im only 17 and things like this shouldn't bother me but they do and I cant help that. It honestly did make me feel really down and I haven't known what to do with myself Ive just been staying in and over thinking things which again is not a good thing to do.
However I don't want this to sound all doom and gloom I do have some Thank Yous to give out and some news. I obviously cant thank every single person individually however I want to thank everyone who has been reading my blogs from the beginning and I cant believe its nearly been over a year since I created Everythings Megsy and how many opportunity it has given me. I also want to say a huge thank you to my sister Rhiannon. Even though I used to find it annoying when she said it she always used to ask me when I was going to start my YouTube and when my next blog post would be up and she always given me advice when I have needed it the most. If it wasnt for my sister I dont think I would be where I am today without her supporting me and pushing me to do what I actually want to do and what I am passionate about and she always gives me things to look forward to and keeps me positive. I honestly cant thank you enough and I really do mean that.
My friend Alex came to me to talk about something today and after I gave him some advice he sent me a lovely paragraph saying " You always see everything in a brighter light" he also went on to saying how I made him look at a bad situation in a different light and how it helped him. Alex then said "Nothing ever gets you down which is such a lovely way to live life. You are such a great role model to people our age so thank you" (before anyone says I have asked Alex if I could include this in this weeks blog so I havent done it behind his back and no I am not trying to big myself up at all!) After Alex sent me this again it got me thinking and at that moment in time even though it was earlier today I wasnt a positive person at all and I didnt see myself as a role mode because I havent "chased my dreams" as some people would put it and I havent pushed myself to doing the things Im passionate about and I really want to thank Alex for sending me this lovely message because I thought if I could give him one piece of advice and it make him look at a bad situation in a different way then why cant I do that for myself. Why cant I take my own advice for once and be that positive person I advice everyone else to be. So Thank you so much Alex.
As some of the people around me may have guessed I haven't really been myself recently I've felt lost and clueless like most people my age feel at this point in their lives. I'm not saying all people go through this but a good percentage of them do. I'm getting to the point in my life where I have to make so many decisions that shape my future and honestly I'm scared. I'm really scared. It only seems like yesterday that I was going into year 7 and time has gone by so fast and I feel like I kind of lost myself on the way. I feel like I forgot about the goals that I have had for many years now and whenever someone such as my sister asks me about it I always make excuses of why I haven't done them or worked for them which is totally wrong. I wish I didn't get into a habit of doing this but unfortunately I did. Because I left it for so long I started loosing my confidence with it which made me put it off even more. I have said for the past 3 summers now that I would start to upload on my Youtube channel but Im sure as many of you know there is only one video up of the interview I did with the M.A.D boys which I obviously loved doing and am so grateful that they let me do it but its still not what I wanted my main focus to be.
Going back to what I said earlier I have had a lot of decisions to make and its been really stressing me out and bringing me down and it shouldnt be getting to me this much. I have to make my mind up of what I want to do after I leave college and what paths I want to take. I also have to think about my final A Level grades and if im even able to get into university. I just feel its a lot of pressure at a young age to have to decide what you want to do for potentially the rest of your life . I know some people say the grades dont define you as a person and yes I agree 100% with that, however they do define if you can get into university or not. On one hand I do want to go to university and prove to people that I can do it and I feel the experience would be brilliant and obviously the fact you can get a degree out of it. But on the other hand I dont know if I would feel comfortable there and I dont know what I want to do yet. Of course I will still apply for as many university's as I can but at the moment I still need to think about what will be the best option for me and my future.
Like I said I dont know what I want to do when Im older. If it was up to me I would be doing full time blogging and Youtubing but that takes years to build up a good profile but I was to chicken to start a few years ago and sadly left it till now. I know im only 17 and things like this shouldn't bother me but they do and I cant help that. It honestly did make me feel really down and I haven't known what to do with myself Ive just been staying in and over thinking things which again is not a good thing to do.
However I don't want this to sound all doom and gloom I do have some Thank Yous to give out and some news. I obviously cant thank every single person individually however I want to thank everyone who has been reading my blogs from the beginning and I cant believe its nearly been over a year since I created Everythings Megsy and how many opportunity it has given me. I also want to say a huge thank you to my sister Rhiannon. Even though I used to find it annoying when she said it she always used to ask me when I was going to start my YouTube and when my next blog post would be up and she always given me advice when I have needed it the most. If it wasnt for my sister I dont think I would be where I am today without her supporting me and pushing me to do what I actually want to do and what I am passionate about and she always gives me things to look forward to and keeps me positive. I honestly cant thank you enough and I really do mean that.
My friend Alex came to me to talk about something today and after I gave him some advice he sent me a lovely paragraph saying " You always see everything in a brighter light" he also went on to saying how I made him look at a bad situation in a different light and how it helped him. Alex then said "Nothing ever gets you down which is such a lovely way to live life. You are such a great role model to people our age so thank you" (before anyone says I have asked Alex if I could include this in this weeks blog so I havent done it behind his back and no I am not trying to big myself up at all!) After Alex sent me this again it got me thinking and at that moment in time even though it was earlier today I wasnt a positive person at all and I didnt see myself as a role mode because I havent "chased my dreams" as some people would put it and I havent pushed myself to doing the things Im passionate about and I really want to thank Alex for sending me this lovely message because I thought if I could give him one piece of advice and it make him look at a bad situation in a different way then why cant I do that for myself. Why cant I take my own advice for once and be that positive person I advice everyone else to be. So Thank you so much Alex.
I also want to say that this morning when I got my AS results back I was gutted with my mark honestly and thought it was the end of the world and then realised I had to go in to get the rest of my results and came out with a distcincion so it does show that something good always comes along when you need it the most so don't worry if things don't work out the way you want them to.
Also my news was that tomorrow I am filming my first real youtube video and that is 100% true this time! Im not sure what Im going to do it on yet I might start of with a Tag that introduces myself or I might talk about this subject a bit more because its approaching results time and Its coming near the time where all different age people have to start making choices wither thats going from school to college or college to uni. Every choice you make maybe scary but it also might be the best choice you will ever make in your life.
I suppose the whole point of me making this blog was to say and as cheesy as this is going to sound is that dont let peoples opinions define you and your future. If your parents want you to choose one career and you don't feel it is right for you then do what you want to do, It's your life at the end of the day and your the one who will have to work in that job for years to come so you may as well do something that you love and are passionate about. I've learnt now that I have to sit down one day, take a deep breath and think about my options and not worry if its going to upset someone else because like I said Im the one whos going to have to live with these choices for years to come.
Also my news was that tomorrow I am filming my first real youtube video and that is 100% true this time! Im not sure what Im going to do it on yet I might start of with a Tag that introduces myself or I might talk about this subject a bit more because its approaching results time and Its coming near the time where all different age people have to start making choices wither thats going from school to college or college to uni. Every choice you make maybe scary but it also might be the best choice you will ever make in your life.
I suppose the whole point of me making this blog was to say and as cheesy as this is going to sound is that dont let peoples opinions define you and your future. If your parents want you to choose one career and you don't feel it is right for you then do what you want to do, It's your life at the end of the day and your the one who will have to work in that job for years to come so you may as well do something that you love and are passionate about. I've learnt now that I have to sit down one day, take a deep breath and think about my options and not worry if its going to upset someone else because like I said Im the one whos going to have to live with these choices for years to come.
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